Content

I’m living the life I’ve always hoped would turn out like this. Where, my only priority is work. The only fixed time I have during the day is, when I leave, and then the day goes on. 11 pm, 5am or 7. Returning home only seems to be a task to be achieved, to prepare ourselves for the mountain that is to begin the following day. 

My working with this company for last season’s Wills Fashion Show was a very minute learning as in comparison to the internship right now. I probably have only expanded my understanding into what precisely goes behind this entire event, held twice a year, and the amount that is actually put into it. 

It isn’t something I get to be creative about or use any kind of skill that I might assume I would have, but I like this kind of work as well. Where we get to be almost like the backbone of the entire event. My contribution would almost be nil, but to watch these guys who’re hardly any older, put in so much, unflinchingly is quite encouraging. And with a staff of just about 8 people, the entire show is handled.  EVERYTHING. Name it. They’re doing it. About four months of work goes into the making of the one week. Twice a year. And then there’re a million other projects to handle as well. 

My doing this was all in all a suprise as well. From preparing myself to attend  my cousin’s engagement. The day we were to leave for McLeodganj was when we had the interview. The interview was for the fashion week, while they were looking out for interns as well. 

It’s been a hectic month. The system fucking our existing fucked up system in college. Where we almost ended up with a month of submissions. Every. Single Day. Then, the exams. Then, the trip. And, this. Quite some time before it finishes as well.

All in all, I’m quite enjoying it all. So far,at least.

Life goes by.

I’d wonder where to begin, but I think i have sufficiently enough, to rant about, as ever. In revenge, for I wonder what, our department has been fucked. So bad, that they thrashed us the entire last two weeks, like never before. This, had to have been officially the worst, ever. Ever. Anyway, we still did manage to survive it all, looking back, we wouldn’t know how as well.

McLeodganj was awesome. Simply, because. Our two day random impulsive getaway. Missing the last direct bus, we caught four buses to finally get there. But, once we were there, all was forgotten. Getting there was quite an adventure too. It has these shacks, every alternate catering with various cuisines. Coffee shops, and few countable Indians. The weather was to die for, after the sultry, humid, irritating, heat from here. The food was much enjoyed, so was the stuff. We stayed there for just about twenty four hours, and all we did was indulge.

Sleep still hasn’t been caught on. Doesn’t look like it will anytime soon either. And, today Delhi was visited like the old times. Randomness in all it’s meaning. Shopped. And, ehmm, Drona.

It’s quite a good movie, you know. Somehow, even typing that, made me want to kill myself. Bollywood’s worst period is here. One terrible movie after another. Jaane Tu.. Singh is Kinng. Rock On. Drona. C’mon, can’t we come up with anything even remotely tolerable?

I can’t wait to see him. It’s been a long time. It always seems that way, anyway.

Another day to go before we’re back to the grind.

All hail!

Clustered

Siddharth rightly called it a reality show. Thirteen of us – the most random group ever. When the list was  out, I was quite glad, that there was no one I knew too well in the group. It only breeds lesser politics, you know. Why were we the most random, because you perhaps would never find any two out of the group ever hang out in college, together. Maheshwar was supposed to be the most beautiful out of the three (Jhabua, Bagh, and Maheshwar itself) and, yeah it was. The place we stayed at perhaps made the stay all the more worthy, unlike, from what we heard from the others. The river ran right at the foot at the resort, and the huge rooms and the sufficient area made it what we would call home for the next two weeks.

The journey was l-o-n-g. And tiring. Day 1 left only a few awake while the rest were recuperating. We slept way after sunrise, ranting about all that we could have. After all, some of us had never quite spoken to each other in the whole of two years. What made it easy for everyone to actually enjoy their stay, was that no one had any pre-conceived notions about each other at all. We were truly random, also in a way that each one of the thirteen could entertain, hold together an audience quite on their own, with whatever randomness they had to them. 

Yes, Alcohol definitely doesn’t go without. As in this story, it begins and ends with it. Oh, we were there for a project, which quite didn’t begin with until near the end, that’s the way it always has been working, hasn’t it?  Anyway, with it being some firsts, hardly any one was tipsy. The following day brought the drama in. Two, asleep. Two of us, not drinking. He took his turn in the morning though. Sloshed. I had an entire day of entertainment, watching eight people completely knocked out. Handling them was no easy task. It was a night, everyone will remember, more in hindsight than anything else. 

Alcohol was a three night trip. The first, everyone was happy high. Conked out before any thing could actually happen. Second, sloshed, with everyone making up their mind, as it goes, never to drink again. The third, shouldn’t have happened. The last day, before everyone left. And of course, not everytime is as smooth as every other time, right? So, typically, there was just enough vodka to get people almost high, and the state wasn’t appreciated by any one. The audience, and the participants. Unecessary spoiling of what could have been an almost perfect ending to the trip. AK was a laugh riot. Where he repeated the same point over and over and over and over again. And his all-famous ‘golden drag’ at the end of the cigarette. *Cough*, we have our laughs now. Of course, he also elaborated his analysis of why-only-use-swear-words-in-English,-get-over-it-and-say-it-in-the-real-language!  

Maheshwar is quite a beautiful place. We spent most of our time by the river side. When it wasn’t all that sweltering, of course. Suprisingly the evenings were quite cool. And the place was picturesque. Swimming in the river, or just lazing at the rapid, doesn’t seem like it even happened. We’d lose all sense of the time talking around there. Whether it was 10 in the morning, or 3 in the night, day and night was no different. 

We’d spent about a week at that place when a couple of ‘others’ had come to see Maheshwar was. Turns out we didn’t quite welcome their presence. Rude of course, but everyone had just started to get used to living that way. If it was just a visit, perhaps no one would’ve lasted for more than 3 days at Maheshwar. It’s nice and all that jazz, but we were losing it towards the end. I will still say the trip was fantastic, but you know, it being a long semester, blah blah, no one had quite had a break yet, this was more like our break. Hence, NO one worked at all. 

Every group has a character. SA was our character. No offence to you, if you ever do read this. You were quite amusing, oft our source of entertainment. SA has a lot of stories to her. Hell,we should write a book, with a zillion chapters to her. I think the idea will quite be encouraged if approached, when college beins. 

Haan, anyway. Rummy (Is that how it’s spelt?) was our constant addiction throughout the trip. We had to play it. E-v-e-r-y-d-a-y.  Anyone who didn’t know how to play, or that asked us to play another game, had to either learn the game, or not interfere with us. So out of the thirteen, I think ten of us knew, including SA who learnt it on the trip, two didn’t bother with us at all. So that would leave them, roughly three to seven hours everyday in solitude. And AK who didn’t bother with any of us at all. We started at teaching SA how to play at some where around 10 in the evening. And, well, two days later, she was still asking us if a-true-series-had-a-joker? And always thrice continuously. That is pretty much the only rule in the game. And hell, even the ones who never played would assume by the end of it all, that they could play as well. She was almost always the butt of all our jokes.

SA also was, how should I put it, ignorant? Or, apparently kept herself out of ‘stuff like that’, in the period having already done her graduation. Seriously! College, or rather, school for some, is the one place, where our education began. Uh-huh education. You get the idea, right? This one late evening, slouched in the courtyard between the two rooms, the conversation got around *cough* ‘Heel inside you’. Forget it, I don’t even remember where the conversation began, or what it led to, but like always, it was a whole lotta crap. Now, ‘ heel inside you’, to a perverse mind, would get one thinking. Not her. Hell, let alone understanding perverse humour, she didn’t even get the female body itself! Some explanation of how-she-didn’t-attend-the-‘one-week’-in-school-when-‘it’-was-all-being-explained,-because-of-some-wedding-she-had-to-attend,-and-no-one-explained-it-later. Blah. Oh, she had her education the next afternoon. The rest of the group almost took it up as a responsibility to educate her. And, yes, laugh at her expense too. C’mon, every bunch of friends, has a weird dick!

Anyway, that was how our random weird trip went on. This post has no flow to it, because it’s being written over a period of time. As I remember stuff from the trip, all dropped in.

Cheers!

 

 

Confounded Confusion

I have fond memories of Hyderabad. Seems like a timeline ago – though it was just two years ago, coming to think of it. I know I’ve changed in what counts of the time, and I also think that quite some friends of mine won’t quite accept me as still part of them. But, I was a very stupid girl then, not that I am any better off now but that term aptly describes me from then.

 I should be in Hyderabad right now. But damn, after that three day confusion, I’m just glad to be doing nothing.

 I wake up the day we’re leaving from Maheshwar, which is quite another story – if written, with my Mom calling me asking me if I’d like to go to Hyderabad with them. Damn right I would! Anyway in that utter confusion of getting to Indore first, I was trying to make up my mind if I’d want to go to Agra and then get to Hyderabad instead of catching the train from Bhopal. I would’ve been leaving with Sid if I did plan it that way, but I was convinced enough to stay on longer, and catch the train from Bhopal. But I was still in thought of getting to Agra, knowing that my Mom wouldn’t bring the stuff that I’d wanted.

 The stay at Indore to me was only a mind game. Spending time at malls is horrible, and talk about getting to know a city that way? Fuck it! I can’t stand malls. And having my foot stuck and dragged along the length of the escalator wasn’t any solace at all. Not that I was injured, but I had to stay barefoot before I went to buy myself the most horribly painful set of slippers. If it wasn’t for ‘Nakhraali Dhaani’, I wouldn’t have liked Indore at all. I did like the place, it was a lot like Hyderabad, or any small city – in comparison with Delhi, of course. Nakhraali Dhaani was thoroughly boring to me as well. See, I was immensely restless after that long two week trip at Maheshwar, what with it also being such a loonng semester; I wasn’t all that tolerant towards doing nothing. Anyway, Nakhraali Dhaani is this typical pseudo-Rajasthani village, where they tried to bring the atmosphere in. It took all of two seconds to scan the place, and the only entertainment was the ‘jyotish’, which of course when all ten of us got down to getting read, blah, was boring as well. Anyway, I’m trying to get to the eating part. It was this *surprise* Rajasthani fanfare of about fifteen dishes which we got to competing to finishing everything. To me- everything but the sweets. The amusing part was the way they’d force feed the food down one’s throat. I don’t do justice describing it, but when your mouth is full and you’re laughing away trying to shove their hand away, while all they attempt at is to make you finish the food, calling you random ‘sethaani’ names. It’s quite a laugh. That simple personal touch to the entire evening is what added the delight.

 After finally setting my directions towards Bhopal, I leave from Indore in time to make it to a 3.00 am train. I don’t take any calls because my Mom’s given me strict instruction of being in Bhopal before 7 in the evening so that I don’t have to be travelling in the night. Well, I get to Bhopal by 10 p m and calling home I hear that my parents haven’t even caught the train that I’m supposed to catch at Bhopal! Argh? I decide to get back to Indore since I have a confirmed ticket from Indore to Agra the next day, which I’d given to a friend to use. I get to the bus station which is some distance away, and I’m waiting for the bus to get full so that I can get to Indore, whiling away my time on the phone. An hour later, the bus still hasn’t budged. Getting in touch with friends, I hear the next train leaving for Agra is about half an hour later. I travel back to the railway station; having dreaded that traveling to Indore was pointless when I ultimately had to get to Agra. And traveling on a general ticket, even if I had to stand all the way, made more sense to me, because my journey would ultimately end in 7 hours rather than getting to Indore and then getting back to Agra which was a longer journey, plus I also had given my ticket to a friend to use.

 My luck has it; the ticket collector doesn’t come checking. I get into this bogie with a bunch of students, with just a hunch, that a group of students are easier to win on your side if the issue ever arose. And also that with so many of them traveling they just might have an extra birth – hell we did too! Turns out, they did.

 Delhi – Maheshwar – Indore – Bhopal – Almost Hyderabad – Agra.

 And the friend I’d given my ticket to – He didn’t even travel on it. Why? Because he’d called the railway enquiry before leaving for the station and learnt that the train was two hours late. Damn! The train that was reaching Indore. Not the one leaving from there! Obviously, he missed that. I can imagine the jugaad, he’d have to do otherwise as well.

 It’s ovah! It’s ovah!

 

Thinking again. I wish it hadn’t. I’m bloody bored.

Doink. I still hate titles.

• I’ve been craving loneliness lately. The fact that I want to come home to an empty house. Even if it is, just to blare some loud music and sleep. I don’t want the presence of human contact in the vicinity. I don’t give a fuck about a lot of things anymore. Not that I ever did, but I’ve distanced myself even more.
• I love my new sound system. Of course, I do. In the last nineteen years, THIS is what I’ve always wanted. Paying out of my own pocket too.
• I’ve found motivation for my goals in the long run. But I think my short term ones have dwindled. Like, right now this minute, I know I have a list of things to finish, but I’m confused about what to begin with. Which isn’t quite like me. I can’t even write anymore.
• It’s often strange how people don’t realize how much truth any of their random statements actually might contain. It’s eerie. It’s about lending others a perception you perhaps don’t want them to deem. There is nothing much one can do about it though. You have perhaps directed the conversation yourself. Even if you didn’t want to.
• My obsessions:

Design.
Reading.
Music.
Sports.
Travel.
Him.

Die, motherfucka! Die!

May Day

I have a fascination for Indian Toys. And I was more than thoroughly disappointed with that whatever we bought at Janpath. Otherwise of course, it was an awesome day. Horrible exam to begin with. The second one didn’t quite go all that well either. Then again, a lot can make up for things like that, you know. It’s almost the end of the semester, and damn, it’s almost time the grades will be out soon. That is what will judge this semester for me. THIS semester. The previous weren’t quite what I cared about. This again has been a semester of sorts. I think I’ve learnt to be more honest with myself.

I can’t go on.

Get anything of it?

So, for times like this, you should just blog. Blog for the sake of blogging. You know, write about whatever that comes to your mind. Whether anyone understands or not. Whether your own self understand it or not. It’s not meant to mean anything, maybe. Just to remember. Remember? Yeah. Remember all the things.
This is probably the most random. It’s okay. For those who have to understand will understand. Will have understood by now. A lot will clear in the head. Oh, no no. No significance at all. Yeah, to you it won’t. It’s okay. Most often doesn’t hold significance. Hell, my life also doesn’t. Anyway, this isn’t meant to get philosophical. It’s supposed to be plain rant. An I intend for it to stay that way. Just go on, and on. Randomly. Like everything else. It’s time I finished the marketing document. It’s only getting on my nerves. It’s just so lame I don’t want to do it! I have to though. Maybe I should’ve just shut up and not even volunteered. But I had to do something atleast! Is this enough? I don’t know. I’m still not sure. I’ve to just come up with more things that I can gloriously rant about. Hmmm, I like the usage of that adjective. It seems so.. I don’t know. I can’t seem to describe a lot of things, often.

Yaayi!

Coming up with titles, is so boring. They’re always so random, never connected with the post. Perhaps, this might make some sense!

I’m in a mood to do some poetry. I think I have sufficient inspiration too. Yes, you. Just not the right amount of time immediately to be able to do it.

The phase of not using the phone stupidly has arrived on it’s own! Definitely not at the right time. This was a weekend which I thought would be so vella instead it’s turning out to be a fifteen day week. And forgetting the phone in a friend’s car, is simply superb. What timing. It was a mere idea that PERHAPS this weekend I’d switch it off, and it goes tossing itself under the car seat, unnoticed of course, by ME!

I’m having a horrible time with my gadgets! My ipod. My laptop. My phone. My sound system. Every thing’s gone haywire. It never rains, but pours. Yes, we all know.

I’ve successfully finished two pending novels. And if work is done, I’ll get my chance to read some more. Or, maybe just watch the movies I’ve been wanting to. Or, Scrubs, season 3! Or, prison break!

I’ve gotten used to falling asleep talking to him. Yesterday, was funny without the phone. Staring into random space, with the irritating mosquitoes too. What with the power gone too. When did this begin?! Stupid power cuts. I had a very random dream, yet again. I remembered while I was brushing my teeth. But I can’t seem to understand what in the world it was about. Just the people. One of them, rather. God knows.

Being in random mood to write, that’s all the trash I can seem to come up with.

Thwack! Thwack! (Poof!!!)

Was.

After all these years of constantly reminding myself about not expecting anything ANYWHERE, always holding a little scope of things not eventually working out, I forgot about it over the last two weeks. However trivial an issue it might seem, it was something i have been looking forward to doing. I never seemed to even bother that it just might not happen, eventually. Perhaps, that, conviction without the non-possibility probability should have been sign enough. Yeah, so it just might not be happening, after all.

Life is all Haa Haa Hee Hee

More than often, I’ve always been discerning about my looks, and to have friends drag you along to parlors claiming two minutes, while they actually take two thousand eleven hundred and eighty seven minutes can be an apprehensive notion. Of course, the mind will concoct a million scenes where each of the beauticians and the clientele are staring at me, wondering why I’m not the one in that seat letting them rip apart an already ruined face.

The only company I had was this one kid perhaps aged six whose mother had obviously dragged without a choice. I was made to help around with my friend’s treatment, and we couldn’t help, but over hear the conversation with the kid. The kid stares around helplessly tugging at his mommy’s clothes asking her if he could go home. And then, begging. Finally ending it, screaming, “pottaiiii”. We couldn’t help but burst out laughing at the kid’s antics to try and get his mother’s attention.

This was another day, though. I was also, gagged, and bound and left to myself in lunch. I took my revenge by emptying the bin over the bunch of them.

Today, was completely vella. The most, in the entire semester, perhaps. What with our professor attracting small-pox. And, then bunking the second session entirely, just to go shopping, which was another first this semester, the weather completely awesome with it all! The shopping session got boring, but the weather couldn’t just disappoint! Turned up late for the last session, which anyway didn’t quite happen. In all urgency to want to use the loo all afternoon, and that bloody traffic light, which took almost half an hour for that u-turn. Home, which was actually two minutes away, took close to twenty-five minutes! In all our attempts to distract ourselves, we spotted this hot guy across the road, where we began to whistle. Considering it too far, we decided to wait till we took the u-turn. Finally, almost, it being our turn, she jumped the signal and while having seen the guys move away, we ended up whistling at a speeding motor-bike.

This probably sounds totally useless, but somehow at the spur of that moment, the amusement of the day seemed to just carry on. In fact, while I was almost home, the “can we friends” happen to be crossing the car right then. While I was thanking my friend for dropping home, he kept screaming about what time he would meet “us” in the evening.

I don’t want to forget all these days. So much randomness. All day. All along.